Abundance

I have been going back and forth lately about abundance. What it means and why do I deserve it? Abundance is promised to us all, it is freely ours for the taking, yet we often leave it behind as we push forward to where we think it may be. I have had a huge lesson lately in abundance, and the ridiculous carrot we turn it in to as we run endlessly on the same old hamster wheel. Abundance is already ours so why don’t we have it? How has this become such a hard topic for us all? There is probably a million things to blame. Bad influences, internet, greed, insecurity… The list goes on and on. But, like most things, the responsibility lies right in us.

So you know what I did? I decided I had it, and I was going to own it! What’s this you ask? Did I win the lottery? Get a new job? How about a big inheritance? Nope. I just decided to own what I always had. I am swimming in abundance. I found that the minute I decided that I had enough, I indeed had enough. Not only that, but as I decided I had enough, what I had, grew. No matter the situation, the job, the income, the home, or the car. If I have it, its enough. If I need it, I have enough to get it. My biggest problem with abundance was my own stipulation of what that looks like. How much money I have, how big my house is, where I fall on the social ladder. All of these stipulations that I said were blocking my abundance, were in fact doing so. Not because that is what they do, but because it is what I do. I have wasted so much time not having enough, that I was always going to have not enough. Abundance isn’t a salary or a home. It isn’t the likes on your Instagram or followers on whatever social media you use. It isn’t beauty or style, words or even actions. Abundance is you. Just you, as you are, and without a doubt, more than enough.
It took me a really long time to understand that doing what I love meant doing what I was meant to. Even longer to understand that as long as I put out love and abundance, I will receive love and abundance in return. The last year has been the most uncertain of my life. Uncertain in the fact that I had nothing to compare this to, no guaranteed salary, and no idea where I was going. Completely certain, that with all of that being said, I knew with out a doubt that not only was I jumping, I was going to fly. The second I decided I was enough, I had enough, and that failure wasn’t an option, it wasn’t. My entire mindset changed, and with that so did my worth. For so long, life was about a number, or a title, or a social standing. Every goal I reached somehow became the starting point for another. If only we had this much, or this job, or this home. Nothing was enough, so no matter where I went, I was always left still searching, The universe provided. We reached the milestones we never thought we would and never had I felt more disconnected. I lost myself and everything I knew I wanted. The very second I shifted from what I need to what I have, I had everything!

Abundance is ours, its engrained into our very souls. Its not a status, its a mindset. We are farmers of our life. We reap what we sow. Every single time. I was walking around planting beans and expecting watermelons. How does that make sense? I was getting exactly what I asked for. Not enough. For every “if only” I achieved I had two more to take its place. I was so over the “if only.” When I came out of the medium closet and started Life Love & Spirit, I did so with the most humblest of hearts. I knew this was going to be all I needed. I had to have faith and faith alone. I had no way of knowing where it would take me, or who it would take me to. I just knew that even if it meant I let go of everything I thought I knew, this would be all I ever needed to know again. I fell, I faltered, but I didn’t stop. I am abundant. I told myself that every time. Every single thing I have needed, I have received. When I lived abundantly I was rewarded abundantly. I am here to tell you, you are abundant. You have everything you ever need and what you are meant to do is inside you. You don’t need the sure thing, you don’t have to chase the carrot. Your abundance doesn’t come from making others rich. Being abundant means sharing abundance, not slaving for it. Have faith, and be grateful. When what you have is more than enough you will always have more than enough. Once you truly know that you will watch what you have grow. Own your abundance, own your place in this world.